Fighting For My Heart

‘Fighting For My Heart’ is a worship song which was originally written for those wrestling with issues of self-hatred and self-harm, although the song has become an anthem of hope to many others too.

The song was written by KXC’s Rich di Castiglione and LA-based songwriter Jordan Frye (Urban Rescue & Jesus Culture). The song is being released with both “KXC” and “Rich & Lydia Dicas” on Friday 26th June 2020.

The heart of the song is the Romans 8 passage that celebrates how nothing can separate us from the love of God - not even our own brokenness. The chorus echoes Psalm 139 and Psalm 23 with the words:

Even if I go to the highest place

Or sink to my knees and hide my face

I cannot out-run, I can’t escape

Your love is chasing after me

So often we try to hide from our pain but the truth is that we can’t get away from his presence. Rich & Lydia say: ‘At home we often talk about how we always want to ‘fight for each other’s hearts’. That we don’t want to let shame come in between us and that we always want to find connection with one another. We’ve both personally experienced how the Lord has done this in our hearts – he loves us as we \are but always wants to see us step into greater measures of freedom and honesty in our relationship with him. He is constantly drawing us into deeper intimacy and inviting us to share with him both our joys and our disappointments. God is not aloof or disinterested in our hearts – he is also not scared or intimidated by our brokenness. He doesn’t want us to be numb or anaesthetised to our pain but to bring it to him – to be vulnerable and let him see our scars and care for our wounds.’

The second verse paints a picture of lifting hands in worship and baring to him our scars as we openly surrender our hearts to him. The bridge is a confident declaration that we are ‘never abandoned and never rejected.’ It’s both a cry for those who have been struggling with self-hatred and also for those who can declare it over others. The words are written for the church to prophesy to a broken and hopeless generation that ‘you are never abandoned and that you have a Father who is fighting for your heart’.

We hope this song can become an anthem of hope for all who have no hope left for themselves. We pray it would be a song of deliverance for those suffering from self-hatred and anyone engaging in self-harm.

Much love from all at KXC,

Rich & Lydia di Castiglione, Tom Eccleshall and Pete and Bee Hughes